how precious life is

Wednesday, June 25th, 2008

I realize I’ve been quiet lately. I guess I’ve been going through a “flat” phase again. Although, yesterday was a hard day but I’m not sure why. I was just kind of down.

We’re getting our house ready to put on the market. We had started this while I was pregnant with Felix but hadn’t gotten very far. In fact, I’m pretty sure it may not have happened had Felix come to stay. I’m getting excited about freshening things up to sell this place. I need a change of scenery. Maybe it will help us “move on” a little. It will no doubt be sad to go… we moved in 8 months after we got married and brought our children home here. But, needs change and it’s time to go.

Once again, I have song lyrics to post. I can’t help it, music is one of the loves of my life. This song is by a guy named Andy Gullahorn. Brian just got his album Reinventing the Wheel. You should check him out. http://www.andygullahorn.com

How Precious Life Is
We moved the desk out of the office
Took down the college picture frames
Painted all the walls yellow
Because it goes with anything
Put those guards on all the outlets
Found a safer car to buy
Did it all for your protection
And your mama’s piece of mind

I couldn’t see it ‘til now
You were teaching us then
How precious life is

I saw you in that picture
When they said you were a boy
Though I swore I had no preference
Those words filled my heart with joy
My mind raced ahead a decade
It had us camping near a fire
Where you’d tell me all your troubles
And I’d make everything alright

I couldn’t see it ‘til now
You were teaching us then
How precious life is

God willing if we have another child
I’ll see it for the miracle it is
I’ll be hanging on to every blessed breath
‘cause I can’t forget
How precious life is

I thought I knew what pain was
But I really had no clue
Until the hope was disappearing
And there was nothing we could do
I was too tired to shout in anger
Too scared to run and hide
I just stared there at your mother
And thanked God she was alive

I couldn’t see it ‘til now
You were teaching us then
How precious life is

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One Response to “how precious life is”

  1. aunt bippy Says:

    Amanda and Brian,
    This is just my feelings…I can’t imagine your feelings..I only know what our family went through during Susie and Mike’s death…we have survived all these years, but it sure wasn’t easy..I know that when Kelsey was born, that the doctor said I was probably carrying twins and that one did not survive…I think about this all the time…I did not experience what you both have,,,but I do think about the possibility that she had a twin and we did not get to have that chance to love 2 babies…I just wish that MiMi was here to help you through your feelings, but we all know that you carry the strength to get through this and that you have all of us to help you through this…all you have to do is call….I may not be the closet one, but I love you…and that is all there is to know..love Aunt Bippy..

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About Me

Gabriel Elliott Groce

I am a wife, a mother, a woman of God. I have 3 living children and 2 in Heaven. I am writing of the loss of my youngest sons: Felix David who died April 2, 2008 (no known cause) at 24w 3d and was born still on April 4, 2008 and Gabriel Elliott who was born on October 19, 2009, lived for 32 minutes and died peacefully in his daddy's arms. (Gabe was diagnosed with limb-body wall complex - a rare and fatal birth defect - at 19w 6d and we chose to carry him to term.)

I may be upbeat at times, down or silent at others. I hope that by writing about my experiences I can help people understand my grief and maybe help them through theirs.

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