back to "normal"

Well, tomorrow I return to work. This weekend was very difficult for me. I just don’t know how it will be to return to a place in my life where things haven’t really changed. Everything else in my life is different now. I am trying to find my new “normal.”

I hope that it won’t take me too long to adjust back into my work life. I expect that my approach to work might be a bit different now. Major life events tend to change a person’s perspective. I hope to be kinder, more of a “big picture” person, not get swept up in things that really aren’t a big deal in the grand scheme. I want to do (or continue to do) well in my position while I’m there – and then be able to leave it there when I go home at night. I have some great friends/co-workers there who (I hope) will help me through this last transition “back-to-life.”

I have struggled over these past 8 weeks because my life was the only one that hadn’t yet returned to some sort of normalcy. I was not used to being a stay-at-home mom. It is my dream job and now I have to let it go again and it really hurts. Ezra hasn’t left my side since I came home. I hope he will do alright with me going back to work. Chloe and Dylan have loved it, too, and I know they will miss me. I will miss having breakfast with them, playing outside, having lunch with them, tucking them in for naps and cuddling with them after they get up from naps. My time with them will be shortened and it makes me angry. I guess I’ll just have to get over it – again.

I’ll let you know how it goes.

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